How do you tactfully bring up the pay for play scenario with a "mainstream" stripper?

[Hawley Griffin]

I've noticed that some of you have posted about getting outside "fun" from strippers. (the mainstream sort not the *** or S5 kind)
I was curious how you "tactfully" bring the subject up without looking like a complete scumbag.
Or is this something that comes with the territory?
Aside from the obvious "loose" stripper who has either given me a hand job or allowed me to play with their private parts in the VIP room, it seems like a difficult subject to bring up. And even in the former cases, Ive recieved comments to the ilk, "I'm a dancer not a whore!" (5 minutes after her hand was on my dick for a good tip)

I suppose the scumbag image is something I can live with, but there's got to be a better way, right? I fear if Im less direct than they will misunderstand my intentions as a creep who is asking them out on a "date" instead of what it really is.

[Slimmy]

If you really want to waste your time trying to get a stripper to do what you want, you are best off just looking like a scum bag! I mean, do you really care what they think? I have spoken to plenty of strippers, and they have told me many times, how they go back into the dressing room and make fun of and ridicule the customers. So you might as well look like a scum bag from the get go, cuz they do not like you anyhow! Sorry, hate to be so blunt, but why waste time! Plus as it has been said in the past, the dancers that do play, are usually way too expensive and not worth it. Just my 2 cents!

[Hawley Griffin]

While I have heard some outrageous offers. I wouldnt call 500 for a multiple hour date expensive. (the one and only time I succeded with a stripper) Cheaper than most who advertise here.

[Slimmy]

First off, it seems like whenever I make a post these days, it doesnt show up. Wonder WTF I did wrong?

Second, just ask the dancer! Use the old, "you should come to my office and dance for me there, where it is more private." Then you will see her response. If it is positive, then pursue it. But do not worry about looking like a scumbag! I mean they are only dancers! And they do not really like us customers anyhow! And to be honest, they are too expensive. But hey, do as you want.

[justlooking]

I usually get to know the stripper pretty well over multiple visits and then ask her. By that point, I'm beyond looking like a scumbag.

If you're just gonna ask strippers you've just met off the bat, you have to not worry about looking like a scumbag.

[Hawley Griffin]

Originally posted by justlooking
I usually get to know the stripper pretty well over multiple visits and then ask her. By that point, I'm beyond looking like a scumbag.

By "beyond" do you mean instead of looking like a scumbag you now look like a creepy regular?
Seriously, I suppose the making yourself more friendly by multiple visits may make it easier. But to me that would be harder as once you get "chummy" and youd be less inclined to view them as "merchandise". (to be blunt)

[justlooking]

The point is, I don't view them as "merchandise." I think that's why my success rate is so high.

[Hawley Griffin]

Thats why I put the word "merchandise" in quotations- a lack of a better sentiment.
What I mean is that once you get to know someone better BUT not like a friend its harder to be so blunt in such matters, dont you think?

Me personally, I can ask such things of strangers or people I'm intimate (not neccessarily physically) with, not someone who I'm freindly with as you dont wish to offend.


But I get your point nonetheless, youre saying there is no way you can ask such a thing and NOT appear to be pond scum.

Thanks for the input.

[justlooking]

No, that isn't what I mean, really.

What I mean is, that if over time you get "friendly" (within the confines of a commercial relationship), and meanwhile in-club mileage is escalating (within the confines of whatever's available in the club), eventually it just makes sense when you tell the stripper that she could make more money off you, and have a better time in the bargain, if she saw you outside. It doesn't seem scummy; it seems natural.

Note that that's probably a minority approach. The majority approach is to just ask as many strippers as you want, right off the bat, if they're "daters". (THAT'S the one where you can't help looking like pond scum.) It's less work. The problem is, from my perspective, that that way you only get to "date" the strippers who are effectively "prostitutes", and you tend to get fairly impersonal service to match.

[justlooking]

www.utopiaguide.com/forums/showthread.php?postid=230826&highlight=spoil#post230826

[justlooking]

http://utopiaguide.com/forums/showthread.php?threadid=16208&highlight=stripper

[Hawley Griffin]

Not to be a wise ass but isnt any stripper who is willing to see you outside the club for money a prostitute?
Or are you saying that the ones who reluctantly do it or are choosey with whom they do it with are a better experience?

[Hawley Griffin]

I'll go look at your link before I post any more...thanks

[justlooking]

I'm not done yet.

http://utopiaguide.com/forums/showthread.php?threadid=15641&highlight=stripper

[Hawley Griffin]

Now here's a great answer:

Originally posted by Danielle
How about, after a few visits and sufficient small talk saying something like; "I would love to take you out and spoil you. We could have a great time and I could take care of some things for you so that you wouldn't have to come to work as often if you didn't want to. No strings attached or anything, I'd just like to see you for a few hours once a week/every two weeks/whatever." Then you give them your bussiness card and tell them to think about it and that you would love for them to call so you two could discuss the arrangement. That way you've established your intentions clearly without sounding too sleazy, and you've given them an opportunity to mull your offer over so they don't feel put on the spot to give you an answer.

Your other link had a link to another thread that was 60+pages long!! Care to give me a summary?

[Hawley Griffin]

This is like youre giving me homework. ;)

[justlooking]

No pain no gain.

[justlooking]

Here's the best one, though, and it's only one post.

http://utopiaguide.com/forums/showthread.php?postid=199650&highlight=stripper#post199650

[justlooking]

Really, that justme post I linked in my last post is what you really need to read.

[Hawley Griffin]

I'll see you in a couple of days.

Mr. Looking you have quite an impressive post total and you seem to be well respected here, I am flattered and grateful that you have taken the time to respond to me.

[Hawley Griffin]

Here's a follow up question before I go researching these links:

Does the longer, more arduous (or maybe I should say time and money consuming, since hanging out in strip bars aint hard) process that you describe produce that much of a better experience to be worth it?

[justlooking]

Oh god yeah.

[justlooking]

Don't forget: read that last-linked justme post first.

[danger-us]

Originally posted by justlooking
No pain no gain.

And you're talking about a whole lot of pain. I don't now if I could relive it.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by Hawley Griffin
I've noticed that some of you have posted about getting outside "fun" from strippers. (the mainstream sort not the *** or S5 kind)
I was curious how you "tactfully" bring the subject up without looking like a complete scumbag.
Or is this something that comes with the territory?
Aside from the obvious "loose" stripper who has either given me a hand job or allowed me to play with their private parts in the VIP room, it seems like a difficult subject to bring up. And even in the former cases, Ive recieved comments to the ilk, "I'm a dancer not a whore!" (5 minutes after her hand was on my dick for a good tip)

I suppose the scumbag image is something I can live with, but there's got to be a better way, right? I fear if Im less direct than they will misunderstand my intentions as a creep who is asking them out on a "date" instead of what it really is.

Ok. JL is the master when it comes to this, but I have learned a lot from him.

I can only tell you what works for me. Outside fun from a stripper is going to cost you good money. Besides whatever amount you agree on for the outside date, you also need to spend money in the club. Lapdances, VIP dances, Drinks for you and her all add up. My approach is that I get to know the stripper. Make a few visits to the club before you ask her if she is willing to see you outside of the club. I have found that if a stripper feels comfortable with you, she will more than likely agree to see you outside of the club. Most of them just want to make sure that you are not a psycho before they agree to see you outside of the club. Remember most of these girls get asked a hunred times a week for their phone numbers. On more than one occassion, I have had a stripper agree to give me her phone number just because she thought I was nice. Again, that all goes back to making multiple visits to the club and making the girl feel comfortable with you.

As far as asking the question, its plain and simple. Just mention that you would like to see her outside of the club. Keep it simple. Remember to always be respectful when asking. The dancers will appreciate that and it will pay off for you in the long run. How are you asking the girls for the outside fun? I have never had any stripper tell me that she is a stripper and not a whore. I think its your approach to how you are asking them. If you make them fel like a $2 whore, you will get responses like that. I've had strippers that didnt want to give me their phone numbers, but because I was respectful to them, they were also respectful back to me.

The best advice that JL ever gave to me was to just act natural with the strippers and that is the best approach. When you try to kick "game" to these girls, they arent going to want to be bothered.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by justlooking
Oh god yeah.

BIG FUCKING DITTO!

[opus]

tiny bit off-topic, (I don't think I can start a thread yet) but this week at a mainstream club -- am I allowed to say which club? -- I had a dancer offer me her number. This was on the first night I met her, after just 4 dances and 1 drink, and was totally unprompted. That was a first for me.

Not sure if I'll follow up since I don't know if I want to go thru the hassle and expense of finding a hotel (she said we'd have to find a "mutually acceptable" place -- specifically not hers and not mine), and I suspect she'll want more than I want to spend. But I am curious about prices, and man I'd like to grab onto her giant fake cans.

[justme]

Why not just call her and see where it goes?

[puffin]

Originally posted by justme
Why not just call her and see where it goes?
I know you want to find the right words to proposition the girl, but really no matter what you say - no matter how innocuous - the girl may interpret it the wrong way and accuse you of being a creep.

Face the unpleasant truth: If the girl's a sweety, and you treat her nice, odds are that she'll be nice. Yet if she has a history of family problems, a chronic habit, or has simply had a bad day - then the only thing that will keep a smile on her face most of the time - is CASH.

Wish it were otherwise.

[justlooking]

I'm still not seeing any downside here.

[Escort_King]

I have had some success by being at a club near closing and ask where everyone goes afterwards... there are ususally late night spots some go to and if you have been freindly they will tell you.

[Hawley Griffin]

jl- I read quite a bit of those threads and will keep much of the advice dispensed by you and others in mind. (especially Danielle who seems to have been banned)
Many Thanks!

[rrrrr]

I was going to create a new thread but this is all I am able to do, it's not working.

Let me tell you my story though, I am trying to hear from people more knowledgeable about the stripper club industry.

I was invited to a strip club because a friend of a friend was turning 21. I went.

My friends left later leaving only friend of a friend there, so I sat by myself, a dancer just came up and sat on me, so we talked a little, told what I was doing there, etc, she told me she was just there because she had nothing better to do with her time and as long as she pays, they don't care (she had to explain to me who she was paying). I asked for a dance, I got it and she left, she kept saying she doesn't want any money but I gave her some telling her I want to help her pay the entrance fee.

Later another girl came by and offered a dance, I accepted. She started talking about her nails and how they are so ugly, asked what my name is, I said it was Ryan, she told me her name was Karen, that's her real name, her stage name was some other name, I forgot what she said.
Her: So what do you do for a living?
Me: Actually I'm going to college right now and will soon graduate.
Her:Oooh so what do you want to do when you grow up?
Me: Laugh.. Well I plan on getting into the insurance field.
Her:Oh I know someone in the insurance industry Let me give you my phone number and I will give you his number. Let me give you my number before I go.
Me: I'm not going to be around for much longer.
Her: I don't like to give my phone number out.
Me: pausing,
Her: I know this guy in the insurance industry, real sweet, he comes to my house, visits me, great guy, he's my guy for life. Is that what kind of insurance you want to do?
Me: yeah.
Her: My name's Karen, easy to remember, 555-
Me: (interrupting) Wait let me see if I have a pen, (check my pockets).. no.
Her: gives me the rest of the number.
I repeat it to her since I don't have a pen.
Her: How tall are you?
Me: 6'3"
Her: Oh I love it!

Then the dance starts and I haven't had any like it it was actually annoying because she was almost acting like she was having sex, girl on top, which almost made me throw up since I had been drinking, then some kind of doggy style. I must say I bet she is great in bed.

The song was over and she said do you have my number and I repeated it and she said great. Then I didn't know there is a $10 minimum for dances and I didn't have enough cash, she got pissed at that and called a bouncer over because I only had $3, so I told the bouncer I will go break a $20.

While I was at the bar I heard her call my name but I ignored her, I came back and she was sitting in my chair smiling at me. I gave her $10 and left, not saying anything.

The next day, Saturday, I called her, I basically wanted to see if this is her actual number because I was really curious to see if she gave me a fake number to give her big tips. And yeah I want to see what it could lead to.

I dialed it, called, she picked up and was apparently in a conversation with somebody else though I didn't hear what she said and could only hear her voice. Finally she said hello to me and I told her my name, I saw her at the club last night, she remembered me, saying I wanted the insurance info, I said yes, then she said I was the one who wanted to tip her $3 I apologized for the tip deal saying I dont' go to those places much and she said no problem next time you know, she remembered me, said she would call me in 30 minutes, she's at the grocery store, she'll call me when she gets home.
She never did and now it's Tuesday.




So my question is how common is this to happen, am I suppose to take it as a cue to call her and offer money for sex or something or possibly a free time, I'm young, girls like me and all but have a hard time at the thought I'm some super hunk that swept her off her feet in 10 seconds of conversation. I would say maybe she was high but she remembered me the next day. Or maybe she was just trying to be helpful I have no idea, any suggestions on how to proceed? I have no idea at this oint if I even did call again she woudl respond. Sorry this is long but I didn't want to leave any detail out.

[justme]

It's quite possible that she was high and she remembered you the next day.

[justlooking]

1. This exact thing -- the talk about the nails, the offer of the hookup with an insurance professional, the undertipping and the subsequent confrontation, the phone call the next day -- happens to most of us all the time.

2. What do have to lose by calling her again? Keep in mind what you would want to happen -- an unpaid date? a paid "date"? more info about the insurance guy? -- and try to move things in that direction. The worst that could happen is that she'll blow you off.

Please don't take this as an insult directed against you in particular, but sometimes when I read these "how should I approach a stripper?" threads, I get the feeling that some guys here are afraid of girls or something.

[BigMadM]

This is an area that I find interesting because I only go to tittie bars when dragged by friends.
In the environment of tits waving all over the place, and girls grinding their chubby asses on my dick, I tend to forget most of these girls are just there for the 15 dollar lap dances.
I say stupid stuff like, I might whisper, "lap dances dont cut if for me, name a price and we can get out of this shithole."
Man, I love when the bouncers come looking for me 5 minutes later.

I currently see , and it would be against the rules, her rules, to post her name, a dancer that works, well, lets say somewhere not that far from where I live.
Shes young, cute, and she swears shes very select with whom she beds.(for money ofcourse)
I dont believe her for a second.
But, getting back to the original question in this thread, I dont think I have the patience to woo a stripper, or do I care too, with all the young hardbodies willing to just take my money with out any of the phony sociallizing shit.
If I want to woo or pickup a women, I have to stick to the older ones, that will fuck me for who I am, not what I can offer them as far as cash.
Thats usually a long drawn out process, discussing kids, life, marriage, etc....and sometimes the prize for all the time invested is more like the booby prize.
It really sucks when after I had sex with a women, if I feel like she got the best end of the deal. She has to be pretty fucking ugly and fat and old for me to say that.
Hey, at least I get my dick sucked.

I think all women such as strippers have to be approaced differently in each situation.
I dont undersand the social games played by strippers that know they will fuck you for 3oo bucks from the beginning of the conversation.
I guess maybe they feel you shouldnt think they are loose, or easy to get. (Yeah, none of them are loose)

[justlooking]

Originally posted by BigMadM
Man, I love when the bouncers come looking for me 5 minutes later.

Does that really happen to you?

Nothing remotely like that's ever happened to me.

I don't say this to be boastful or anything. I just always figured that "bouncer coming after you" stuff you sometimes here about was bullshit. You're the first credible person with any game at all that I've heard say it. So it really happens?

[fumpton]

Originally posted by BigMadM
I guess maybe they feel you shouldnt think they are loose, or easy to get. (Yeah, none of them are loose)

It's the old "I'm a stripper, not a hooker" rationale.

But what's ironic is that some of the biggest porn stars have started off as strippers.

Jenna Jameson, Carmen Luvana, Dayton, Devon, Savanna Sampson to name a few.

[BigMadM]

I dont mean a big guy with tatoos, sometimes, the bartender might just lean over and tell me not to be so agressive in his own words........It only takes one person to tell me to behave. some girls Have told me to fuck off.......I notice when they leave they seem to point me out to someone sitting somewhere.
I dont get rowdy, or rude, just want to get my dick sucked.
I dont frequent these places...its usually when Im on vacation with other couples and the guys choose a night out.
I never pick these clubs, these guys seem to sniff them out with there noses....sometimes...I think me and my wife are friends with couples like BillyS or Jimbo......
Ive never been kicked out of the few Ive been too, but I dont have any luck inside of them either.
I posted somewhere I was going into Upper NY state, and some guy made a suggestion about a bar with dancers, and I dreaded the thought of going in alone. Figured Id get thrown out in 1o minutes.

[BigMadM]

I was at the Taj a few weeks ago....the lobby bar.......man....anyone seen that afternoon cocktail waitress with the medium length dark hair. 26-28?ish......I constantly make passes at her until a few weeks ago the bartender told me she told him to ask me to give it up, its getting old. Fuck her, Ill drink my sodas somewhere else now. What a fucking waste of tips and time. But she is just so freeking hot to me.
The bartender on duty, never saw him before, was polite and sort of told me in a man to man way, instead of hey, dickhead, youre an old fuck, leave my girl alone.

[justme]

Originally posted by fumpton
Jenna Jameson, Carmen Luvana, Dayton, Devon, Savanna Sampson to name a few.

Kiko Wu.

[Hawley Griffin]

Originally posted by justlooking
Please don't take this as an insult directed against you in particular, but sometimes when I read these "how should I approach a stripper?" threads, I get the feeling that some guys here are afraid of girls or something.

Well, yes.

If I wasnt so socially inept I might not have to pay women other than my wife to fuck me.

[justlooking]

Hey come on Hawley. If you have a wife then there's one woman who you pursuaded not only to fuck you but to spend the rest of her life with you.

[justlooking]

(I wasn't talking about you anyway.)

[Hawley Griffin]

Originally posted by justlooking
Hey come on Hawley. If you have a wife then there's one woman who you pursuaded not only to fuck you but to spend the rest of her life with you.

Well, the wife was more approachable in the sheer fact that she aint no model (altho pretty, but not stripper pretty). Plus it took me damn close to a year to convince her to date me and I have no inclination to ask a stripper out for a year.

[justme]

Stripper pretty? Heh.

[Hawley Griffin]

justme- are you just joking or do you need clarification?

Lets face it, most strippers wouldnt have a job if they we'rent somewhat modelish and sexy in a demure fashion. My wife wont be turning heads down the street, but shes cute and I find her attractive, but I dont think many guys would be interested in seeing her at a strip club. (maybe some of you pervs would)

[justme]

My experience with strippers is that they look much, much better inside strip clubs than outside strip clubs (they don't call the house lights ugly lights for nothing). Moreover, I think a lot of people assume that just because a woman's a stripper she is going to be really attractive. While the average stripper is more attractive than the average woman (although I'd be less inclinced to make that claim for the average woman of stripper age, say 18 - 35), I also think that most strippers aren't all that much more beautiful than most women you'll meet on the street.

[justme]

Originally posted by Hawley Griffin
Lets face it, most strippers wouldnt have a job if they we'rent somewhat modelish and sexy in a demure fashion.

Ultimately, I think what differentiates strippers from other women more than anything else is the willingness to take off their clothes for money.

[wsb]

Some of you guys who see prostitutes and strippers b/c you don't think anyone else would be interested in you would be well served to buy an Anthony Robbins book or something similar for motivation and confidence building. You would probably never pay for it again.

BMM --

Sounds like you need to try and be a little more smooth. When it comes to women, there is a fine line between persistence and stalking.

Hawley --

Yesterday you were chatting me up and today you are working the stripper angle? I am deeply hurt.

--wsb

[justlooking]

Originally posted by justme
Ultimately, I think what differentiates strippers from other women more than anything else is the willingness to take off their clothes for money.

Not long ago, I was bugging a Stripper Friend who had stripped her way through college but had graduated the year before to stop stripping already and concentrate on establishing a career.

She started talking about the unavailability of other options in the current economy. I cut her off and pointed out that the vast majority of women don't do sex work.

She responded by saying that she realized that for a majority of women "stripping isn't an option."

I thought that what she meant was that most women simply wouldn't do it.

Only months later did I realize that what she thought she meant was that most women aren't attractive enough (although a glance around at least one club she'd worked at would have disabused her of that notion).

[justme]

I have this conversation with female friends / acquaintences sometimes:

S : Sometimes I think it would be nice to have stripping as an option
M : Well I suppose you always do
S : Yeah right, like I'm (thin enough, big breasted enough, pretty enough, sex enough, blonde enough... etc.)
M : You know that doesn't really matter, right?
S : And that pole stuff looks hard
M : You watch too many movies.
S : So you think I could be a stripper?
M : No.
S : ?
M : Imagine some fat, greasy, coked up, drunk slob trying to put his hands down your bikini bottoms, his mouth all over your body, and whatever he could get from you onto his crotch all because he gave you $20.00.
S : <shudder>
M : And that's not the worst of it.

[BigMadM]

Originally posted by wsb
BMM --

Sounds like you need to try and be a little more smooth. When it comes to women, there is a fine line between persistence and stalking.

--wsb


IM going to use this line.
thanx

[billyS]

Originally posted by BigMadM
these guys seem to sniff them out with there noses....sometimes...I think me and my wife are friends with couples like BillyS or Jimbo......

So you have good taste in friends.

[kromrider]

I know that I have not been around much lately but isn't it very expensive to sit around and try to get to know strippers?? I think that even 4 dances and a drink will cost around 90 bucks, and you don't even have anything yet. For 150 you could hit an in-call for a half hour and definately get laid?

My brother is ten years younger then me and frequently dates strippers. He goes to thse clubs and has the girls buy him drinks. Its funny to watch untill I have spent a hundred bucks on drinks and dances and then the girl goes home with him...

[justlooking]

Well, yeah, but if you're going to strip clubs anyway . . . .

[JackT]

Originally posted by justlooking
Well, yeah, but if you're going to strip clubs anyway . . . .
I never did understand this argument. I mean, you'd actually STILL be going to strip clubs anyway if there was no possibility of extras? I thought the reason sophisticated mongers like you go to strip clubs (and put up with the atmosphere and ridiculousness of lap dances, etc.) is BECAUSE of the potential payoff. They wouldn't waste their time and money otherwise.

[justlooking]

I don't know how to explain this. That's true NOW. But I started out as a strip club guy, not a prostitution guy. So I've long been in the habit of going to strip clubs and paying what you pay in them. So to me, I guess, it's like this wonderful thing that I can spend the kind of money I've ALWAYS spent in strip clubs, but now there's a payoff. Whereas before, I'd spend all that money and there wouldn't be.

That's why I always say that I wouldn't recommend what I do to guys who don't go to strip clubs anyway. It just wouldn't make sense to them. (They'd also be much too impatient.)

[BigMadM]

Originally posted by justlooking
I (They'd also be much too impatient.)

bingo!

[kromrider]

Even in Montreal spending 10c for full contact dances i would get bored. I need a pay-off.

I guess I am not a strip club kind of guy.

[Wwanderer]

Originally posted by justlooking
I get the feeling that some guys here are afraid of girls or something.

Really...do you think?

-Ww

[justlooking]

Occassionally we non-Nobel laureates find ourselves feeling it's worthwhile to state the obvious.

[Wwanderer]

An iron grip on the obvious is a vastly under rated asset, imo.

Guys tend to like the "we pay them to leave" line, but I'll bet there are 10 who pay them not to say "no" for each one of the former.

-Ww

[azzure]

After reading Justme's excellent post that JL linked to earlier, I have a question: how do you know if you are dealing with a "good-girl" or a "bad-girl" stripper. How do you screen out the "bad-girls" given your subtle, indirect approach?

I once came to know a newly minted prostitute working at Redroom who was, at the same time, being kept by the general counsel of a large financial institution. He thought she was a "good-girl." Little did Mr. GC know, that his "good-girl" was turning $50 tricks at redroom to cheap, low-life mother-fuckers like me taking advantage of the $100 fifteen minute special.

Also, when you invest that much time, isn't it possible to get "good-girl" style sex from a "bad-girl" stripper. If so, isn't the good-girl/bad girl dichotomy irrelevant?

[justlooking]

Maybe.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by kromrider
I know that I have not been around much lately but isn't it very expensive to sit around and try to get to know strippers?? I think that even 4 dances and a drink will cost around 90 bucks, and you don't even have anything yet. For 150 you could hit an in-call for a half hour and definately get laid?



See thats the thing. It may get expensive to sit around and get to know strippers, but at least you get to know them. I have met plenty of strippers that I thought were hot, but once I started talking to her I was no longer interested. When I am looking for a pay for play expierence with a stripper, I am looking for a girl who I think is hot and I get along with personality-wise. When dealing with incalls(and I never have) you dont get a chance to get to know the girl. If you're looking for a cheap lay, then going to incalls is probably your best best. With pay for play, I want a girl that I can take out to dinner & that we can either go out clubbing or just hang out at bar and get crazy drunk and then go back to her place for some real fun. I guess I want the whole nine yards when I pay for play.

What it comes down to is the money that you are willing to spend. I have no problem with spending money at a strip club and getting nothing in return(at the club) as long as I can get something outside of the club.

[justlooking]

As much as it pains me to say it, I completely agree with lawyer about that.

[h. von bingen]

Originally posted by justlooking
As much as it pains me to say it.
nota bene.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by justlooking
As much as it pains me to say it, I completely agree with lawyer about that.

JL,
I'll take that as a compliment...:)

[Wwanderer]

Originally posted by justlooking
As much as it pains me to say it, I completely agree with lawyer about that.

That's nothing; BMM admitted/claimed to think like bushleager in a thread in General!

-Ww

[nychelsea]

After another extended absence, it is good to be back on the board. Also good to read some notes from Wwandere and JL about the stripper scene.

For quite a few years, I had great success at strip clubs. Of course, those were the days of the Harmony - both in the "Deuce" and downtown (and come to think of it, the Pussycat on Greenwich St had outside action but not much inside). At the time, I was travelling to California frequently and having great success in SF at the Palace (aka Mkt. St. Cinema) and Mitchell Bros. not to mention the Spearmint Rhino chain and some long gone places in LA. I actually thought I was pretty good at the game until I started trying my luck in the higher end places in the city. Then the game became much more expensive and time consuming BUT the ladies were more attractive (and more bottle blond, chest enhanced, big hair Barbie Dolls!).

But the clubs remain, in my opinion, audition rooms. Many of the ladies are there to make money, and can make some good bucks on the outside as well. Wine 'em and dine 'em. Most interesting.

Nowdays, I spend my hobbying in the massage game in the city. Guess I've gotten stuck in a rut.

Regards to all,

Chels

[loulovesit]

These girls want money... flash if it you got it, but beware most of these girls will string you along until the next guy.

[h. von bingen]

Originally posted by Wwanderer
That's nothing; BMM admitted/claimed to think like bushleager in a thread in General!

-Ww
aint life grand?

[justme]

Originally posted by Wwanderer
Guys tend to like the "we pay them to leave" line, but I'll bet there are 10 who pay them not to say "no" for each one of the former.

This is great.

[milkman]

i go to strip clubs quite often. i tend to ignore the dancers and work the bartenders. doesn't get me laid but i do get quite a few free beers out of it.

[justlooking]

And the bartenders are usually better looking to boot.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by justlooking
And the bartenders are usually better looking to boot.

I've noticed that too. I wonder why that is?

[h. von bingen]

um, maybe it's because they can make almost as much money and keep their tits in their shirt? (it's just a guess.)

[milkman]

actually i find that most(at least half) are former dancers who, for one reason or another, decide they don't want to dance anymore. usually it is because of family reasons. they decide to bartend because they need the money and it is the only thing they know since the age of eighteen. they also stay in the same club where they danced in.

[justme]

That's funny because in my experience it works the other way. They get some hot chick to work the bar or be a waitress and tell them it's no different than the same job anywhere and the money is better than most bars or restaurants (it is). Then the girl sees the crazy money that the strippers claim to make and they get interested. Management does it's best to encourage the transition, of course.

There are a few clubs here that have the practice of letting waitresses do a dance on their birthday. They don't actually have to get any more naked than they would at a beach, but they get a taste of what it's like to be at the center of so many men's sexual attention as well as the (usually much higher than average) stage tips they can get.

------

I tend to think that the staff looks better than the faculty at strip clubs because they are less available.

[Wwanderer]

Originally posted by justme
That's funny because in my experience it works the other way.

Mine too.

(In general I have noticed that the NYC area strip club scene seems to operate remarkably differently from that in the rest of the country, at least based on what I have read in this forum vs my own experiences.)

-Ww

[justlooking]

My experience is the same as justme's and Wwanderer's, even though I live in New York.

(I've always assumed strip-club bartenders and waitresses -- and masseuses, while we're at it -- tend to be better-looking than strippers for the same reason mainstream strippers tend to be better-looking than prostitutes.)

[justlooking]

Go to Penthouse Executive Club some night (if you must). It's really fucking frustrating.

(PS -- In case it's not clear, "masseuses" in that last post was meant to mean strip-club massage girls.)

[JackT]

Originally posted by justlooking
for the same reason mainstream strippers tend to be better-looking than prostitutes.)

what reason is that? (honest question).

[justlooking]

Assuming you have qualms, the better-looking you are the less physically unpleasant stuff you have to do to make a living.

[justlooking]

(I guess that's the same thing hvb said above.)

[h. von bingen]

yeah. and actually when i was posted it, i was analogizing to actresses. (in my head. of course.)

[h. von bingen]

what's a strip club massage like?

[justlooking]

Ask someone who's stupid enough to buy one.

(They give them to you at your seat.)

[h. von bingen]

it's a massage from a girl without a top on? through your clothes? egad. i bet the girl at georgette klinger would take her top off if i asked her. although those aren't very good massages either actually.

it's massage, like on your shoulders? i'm reallly interested. please inform further (anyone), and why you would pay for that.

[justlooking]

No it's worse.

It's a massage, through your clothes, while you're in a seated postition in the middle of a public room, from a woman with her top on.

[justme]

(Redundant)

((Men do stupid things when surrounded by (half) naked women))

[justlooking]

Strip clubs wouldn't do any business if men weren't stupid.

[h. von bingen]

i'm going to open a strip club with alternagirls, good food, serious wine and an impeccable cleaning staff. no artificial flavors or colors or ingredients of any kind. i swear! it's a fucking threat.

that top on thing perturbed me.

[milkman]

that may be true if you are spending your time in nyc clubs. i tend to stick to small town mom and pop type clubs. lets call them cheers with semi-naked women.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by h. von bingen
um, maybe it's because they can make almost as much money and keep their tits in their shirt? (it's just a guess.)

Yea, but if they keep their tits in their shirts then what fun is that for us guys?

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by justlooking
Go to Penthouse Executive Club some night (if you must). It's really fucking frustrating.


JL,
Is it that bad? One of my stripper friends just moved out to Manhatten and she started dancing there. She keeps calling me and bugging me to go down to see her. I've been skeptical to date only because I haven't heard much about the club(except from her). This girl is so hot. She claims that the girls at this club are at her level. Any comments on the quality of the girls?

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by h. von bingen
i'm going to open a strip club with alternagirls, good food, serious wine and an impeccable cleaning staff. no artificial flavors or colors or ingredients of any kind. i swear! it's a fucking threat.

that top on thing perturbed me.

As long as you get hot 20 year old strippers to work there, then you can consider us all your customers.

[milkman]

whats an alternagirl?

[fumpton]

Originally posted by lawyer101
JL,
Is it that bad? One of my stripper friends just moved out to Manhatten and she started dancing there. She keeps calling me and bugging me to go down to see her. I've been skeptical to date only because I haven't heard much about the club(except from her). This girl is so hot. She claims that the girls at this club are at her level. Any comments on the quality of the girls?

go see her. maybe she'll hook you up with another stripper.

[h. von bingen]

Originally posted by milkman
whats an alternagirl?
see suicidegirls.com. (warning: it may not be for you.)

[h. von bingen]

Originally posted by lawyer101
As long as you get hot 20 year old strippers to work there, then you can consider us all your customers.
i have a sneaking suspicion the girls wouldn't be your type. just a guess.

[h. von bingen]

Originally posted by lawyer101
Yea, but if they keep their tits in their shirts then what fun is that for us guys?
you can dream can't you?

[justme]

UG is the land of immediate gratification.

[justlooking]

Originally posted by lawyer101
Any comments on the quality of the girls?

The strippers aren't as hot as the waitresses and massage girls.

[justlooking]

http://utopiaguide.com/forums/showthread.php?postid=344905&highlight=contact#post344905

[justlooking]

Actual remark made by actual stripper as she considered my proposition aloud.

"So it's more like being someone's mistress than like being a . . . ."

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by fumpton
go see her. maybe she'll hook you up with another stripper.

She has put in a good word for me with other strippers in the past. I just think that she didnt realize how expensive it is to live out in Manhatten and she is looking to make some money from me.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by h. von bingen
i have a sneaking suspicion the girls wouldn't be your type. just a guess.

Maybe you could get cat Ballou to strip at your club. Seems like she would fit right in.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by justlooking
The strippers aren't as hot as the waitresses and massage girls.

Ok. So, I guess no contact.
I will end up checking it out. I wont expect too much.

[h. von bingen]

Originally posted by lawyer101
Maybe you could get cat Ballou to strip at your club. Seems like she would fit right in.
i didn't mean not your type -- old. i meant i thought you liked blond girls with long nails and big fake tits. Maybe i'm wrong.

[justlooking]

Hmmmmmmmm. Maybe lawyer WILL like PEC.

[h. von bingen]

chaqu'un a son gout, baby.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by h. von bingen
i didn't mean not your type -- old. i meant i thought you liked blond girls with long nails and big fake tits. Maybe i'm wrong.

As far as strippers go, I tend to follow the blondes with big fake tits. I am picky when it comes to fake tits. I can't stand the real hard ones that don't move even when the girl jumps up and down. I like the ones that are hard to tell if they are real or fake. As far as long nails go, I could care less about that.

On a side note, I hooked up with this stripper a few months back that had fake hard tits. She was real cool and had a great personality and I knew I could get her outside of the club, so I went for it. Anyway, I'm having sex with this girl. She's getting all into it. She's screaming and shaking her body - it was great. All I could do was stare at her tits as they did not move as she was doing this. I swear all I did was stare at them. I felt like I was in the middle of some type of erotic episode of Seinfeld. I had a good time with her, but I will never call her again.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by justlooking
Hmmmmmmmm. Maybe lawyer WILL like PEC.

I just might. I'm going to try to get down there in the next few weeks. I'll let you know what I think.

[h. von bingen]

that was a funny story.

[lawyer101]

HVB,
So what is your type as far as females go? I believe I read somewhere that you said that you were bi.

[h. von bingen]

i like all girls -- but especially the type that look like boys. like that girl on the l word, suzi quattro and her:

http://www.bobgruen.com/files/asst/R.147%20JOAN%20JETT%2077.jpg

[h. von bingen]

it's my oeuvre.
ma comedie humaine so to speak.

see hear:

http://www.utopiaguide.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=14679&highlight=movie+tits

[fumpton]

Originally posted by lawyer101
As far as strippers go, I tend to follow the blondes with big fake tits. I am picky when it comes to fake tits. I can't stand the real hard ones that don't move even when the girl jumps up and down. I like the ones that are hard to tell if they are real or fake. As far as long nails go, I could care less about that.

On a side note, I hooked up with this stripper a few months back that had fake hard tits. She was real cool and had a great personality and I knew I could get her outside of the club, so I went for it. Anyway, I'm having sex with this girl. She's getting all into it. She's screaming and shaking her body - it was great. All I could do was stare at her tits as they did not move as she was doing this. I swear all I did was stare at them. I felt like I was in the middle of some type of erotic episode of Seinfeld. I had a good time with her, but I will never call her again.

where's your review?

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by h. von bingen
i like all girls -- but especially the type that look like boys. like that girl on the l word, suzi quattro and her:

http://www.bobgruen.com/files/asst/R.147%20JOAN%20JETT%2077.jpg

Ahhhhhhh. So you like the chicks with short hair?
What do you think of Alyssa Milano with short hair?
I loved her with long hair, but I could do without her with
the short hair.

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by fumpton
where's your review?

That is about as much as I will reveal on an encounter with
a stripper.

[h. von bingen]

Originally posted by lawyer101
Ahhhhhhh. So you like the chicks with short hair?
What do you think of Alyssa Milano with short hair?
I loved her with long hair, but I could do without her with
the short hair.
it's not the hair. it's the attitude.

[seanc]

I was at the GGR last Saturday, late I mean really late around 1am.

Had a couple hot LD with KC, blonde with big fake tits.

She took 1 minute break for pit stop, came back with a loose mini skirt with nothing 'inside'.

Told me it was the last 2 LDs and if I want to open my fly, she would slip a hat and we can have it.

Went for it, doggy with her sitting facing the wall away from DJ's sight.

We did Frank Sinatra for good 10 mins (2 LDs) and for the last one, she turned around, crushed her tits in my face for me to suck for the whole LD (5 mins)

[lawyer101]

Originally posted by h. von bingen
it's not the hair. it's the attitude.

Ok. So, what do you think about Allysa Milano with short hair? Appearance wise. Forget about her attitude.

[pjorourke]

Originally posted by seanc
We did Frank Sinatra for good 10 mins (2 LDs) What an unusual choice of music for a lap dance.

[Tcat425]

This thread has been pretty interesting. When I first started in this game I was constantly losing $$ to girls who were all promise and no deliver. I had the typical "cheap guys" additude. go in ask for the date and get taken for a ride or slapped. I was treating these girls as if I met them in a dance club instead of a strip club.
I found a legit girl and went out with her for a long time and learned the lessons of how to be with a good girl. It took time and patience and $$$$. Nowadays I I have the time have developed the patience and have alot more money. I look for a relationship with a girl I like to have dances with and spend time with. I give her her due wage for the time we are together and just that. After some time if I see a progressive interest ( better lap dances, an additude that tells me she is happy to see me ) then the next stage is a after work meal (yes a diner at 4 am) I offer her a ride home or pay for her cab. I may try it again in a few weeks. Just dinner or breakfast, I pay.
By this time I know her well and I must like her. Very often she feels the same way. For me the relationship with a dancer is very different than a night with an escort. The dancer is someone I spend time with regularly and will see in a different venue, the escort is always in a hotel. Sex with my favorite dancer is always hotter and more satisfying than with a provider just not always as available. One is like reading a novel with a recurring character the other is like a short story.
I will and have taken dancers as a mistress, but never an escort. There is a difference for me and that is why I am willing to spend the $$ and time. Nevertheless it is just as important that the dancer understand that she is a mistress only and that this will end. I usually will not stay with any girl for more than 9 months and that is for my own peice of mind. I have always had way stronger fellings for dancers than for other providers and keeping things short for me at least keeps it safe. It also stays fresh and fun and I can do the things I enjoy doing over and over without worring that she may get bored.
My last girl went from october '03 to february '04. I had known her for a few years and we always had a good time together. She had been away a while and I found I missed her. As I was not one of her regulars I had no number for her. I asked a friend of hers to let me know if she had plans to return and to call me if she was comimg back.About a year later she came back and I was there her first night. She was nervous, so seeing a friendly face helped. I told her how nice it was to see her again and kept her busy most of her shift. She expressed how nervous she was and i assured her she would remember how to succeed just as she had before. A week later I was back and she was still struggling. More assurances and a lot of time in the VIP and at the end of a long night I asked her for breakfast. She agreed and we ate at an all nite diner on Queens Blvd. I held her hand as I walked her to her car and opened her door. I told her how much fun I had and how I wished I had asked her to do this before that night. I gave her a peck on her cheek and told her to call me if she was having a bad night. I heard from her a week later and agian spent her shift with her. After breakfast that day I told her that the club was a drain for me; too loud and too busy and that 4am on a regular basis was tough for me. I asked her to dinner on a night I knew she worked and she told me she needed to work. I asked her how much she was making a night she said about $$$$ and I told her she would do better hanging out with me and get dinner at a great NYC resturant too.
Our date was amazing. She looked great and she had no idea how much fun she would have. At the end of the night we wound up at the a Brassiere across from the Sheraton for Cafe au lait and then up to the concierge floor of the hotel to see the great view from my room. We shared that view for the next 48 hours and I gave her 2k as a gift. She was exstatic and I had the best time I had in many a month. She was good for everything I wanted to do and she wasn't counting time and had no idea how much if anything I was going to give her.
We saw each other for at least a weekend a month for the next 4 months and it was everything I wanted it to be. I liked the familiarity and how pretty she was. I liked that she wasn't a pro and that she did not depend on me for her livelihood. Mostly I liked her company, that made the s** alot "breaking up" which made it better all around and of course leaves the door open to play again if we are both into it.

[justme]

Tcat - Are you married? I ask because it seems like your process of cultivating a dancer would be effective on any woman. Or do you view your dancer relationships as being severable at any poiont, that is that you can break up with them without any explanation?

[Tcat425]

JUSTME

Tcat - Are you married? I ask because it seems like your process of cultivating a dancer would be effective on any woman. Or do you view your dancer relationships as being severable at any poiont, that is that you can break up with them without any explanation?

I prefer a long term situation for a number of reasons so I do approach it the same way as I might a regular girl. I am willing to put more $ into it than if I was just horny one night and seeking a provider. Also I tend to go back to places I like so I want to keep it friendly. But yes I do think that since I am up front about the type of relationship it is I can sever it at will, and since it is to a great extent based on my availability which is scarce at best breaking up is far easier on all involved. Most topless dancers (or at least the ones that get my attention) are looking for a lover who can take care of them financially and who is not freaked out over their choice of work. I am both. The fact that I am also good relationship material (stable) gives them that Julia Roberts hope and that's fine too. The fact that it is an affair gives them space. Most of them are not ready to settle down now they know there is $$ to be made and I am part of that too. In the end however it is good for all to remember that Julia in that movie knew who she was and was ok to walk away from it at the end too and that is instilled into my dancer relationships from stage one so when the end comes it is easier on all.

[justme]

Thanks for the answer. I agree that the severability is a great aspect of devloping long term (paid for) relationships with commercial sex workers.

[lawyer101]

Tcat,
Thanks for sharing your expierence. It was a long read, but well
worth it.